Dis weekend #ZombieSquad weport. Grammy's houze ands da Zombie Cat

  Dis is my weport dated March da 8fh, 2015fh...time is 2:22 and 30 seconds pm....start of day lights sabing time...(did yu wemember tu set yur clocks backs? My Mom dids dis mornen)....to continue wiffs my weport don'ts yu know.....Me, sissy Pickie, (dat's my sisur), wents tu spended da weekend wiffs Grammy ats hur houze in town...we stayed Fwiday nite, Saturday ands came home tu our houze Sunday mornen (dat's tuday don'ts yu knows) *duplicate stating ob wurds*....anyways to continues on...We all stayeded wiffs Grammy in town whiles my Papa wents tu see his couzin downs below....I wanted tu makes sure I was pwotecten my sissy, my Mom ands my Grammy frum any Zombies dat might be in da neighburhood Zombieing awound don'ts yu know *saying it again*....Fwiday nites pawtrol was all clear wiffs my many pawtrols outsides duren da nite..(about 5 times don'ts yu know) *again saying dis*....Mom and Grammy shutted off da lights abter my last pawtrol ands we all wents tu bed...snugg as a bugg in a rugg *gigglen* Saturday mornen my Mom wents tu our houze tu lets outs hur Chikens and feeded dem and go visit da neighbor lady...she gotted back tu Grammy's houze in town abouts 11:00am, (dat's in da mornen don'ts yu know)....all thru outs da day I wented outs and pawtrolled fur da Zombies fur da #ZombieSquad and all was clear and normel....Grammy gotted home frum visiten hur twin sistur at da Convilisent Haspatial ats 2:30pm, (dat's in da afternoon don'ts yu know) *dere I goes again wiffs da same wurds*, (can'ts takes me anywhere!)...anyways (used dis wurd before)....to continues on....we wents tu dinner...dwats ands not wite...no sharzies frum Mom and Grammy's plate cuz dey ates eberything on dere plates...dat was wrong...*forgives Mom and Grammy with loven eyes*....den we all wents tu our houze tu put Mom's Chickins up fur da nite ands collected da eggs dey layed dat day.....(Dere's nothen like a fresh scrambleded egg don'ts yu know - cut dat out...repeat..repeat...).....den it was time tu goes backs tu Grammy's houze in da big city our town, (where Grammy libes)...All was fine during my nite pawtrols but den it happened....I gots da sent ob sompen stinkie and wotten...sniff..sniff..sniff....I started wining and wining (getten very anxiouus ands excited on my toes weady fur battle)...ands I tole my Mom dat I had tu goes outs tu go one pawtrol fur Zombies...I was very alert and weady fur action! Mom letted me outsided ands da pawtrol begans....Sniff..sniff..sniff...whut is da odur?  I lookeded and lookeded awound, up and down da stweet but nofing was dere......Den it happened tu me...Ands dis is whut happened tu me on dis nite.....It was dark and Grammy has lights outside but nots by da side ob hur shed...(dis is where my Papa has tools and stuff in)....on da side ob da shed it's weally dark...weally....I was walken alertely awound...ands den BAMB...a Zombie Cat came outs ob da dark where he was hiden tu attack sompen ands he came runnen towards me...weally fast wiffs his tail up, eyes bulged outs, moufh wide opened wiffs his big sharp Zombie teefs barren outs at me...I didn'ts gets scared..no way...I'm a professionnal....I stood my gwound ands put my skills tu work fur da #ZombieSquad . I went towards him tu hell bent fur leather....well he gotted WEALLY scareded ands didn'ts wants tu have tu deals wiffs such a Zombie hunter likes me dat he wan past me wiffs his stupid Zombie tail stuck betweens his legs.....I chassed after him when all ob a sudden....he did sompen stupid likes Zombie's will do...he was so scarred and afwaid ob me dat he slipped on his stupid feet ands da next fing I sawed was dat he fell intu an open man whole...I wanned up tu da man whole ands BAMB...WOW...ZAP...he was dead....had dwounded in da water dat was in da man whole...I jumpped fur joy and paw thumbs up....he was destwoyed....one less Zombie in da neighburhood....good fing Zombie's don'ts knows how tu swimm....Grammy's neighburhood was once now a safer and better place now dat da Zombie Cat died....He actually melted in da water cuz it had chemicals in it...I putted da cover backs ontu da man whole and wents backs inside intu Grammy's houze...my Mom turneded off da lights outside...tole me how pwoud she was ob me and how brabe I was wiffs da Zombie Cat den we all wents tu bed fur da nite....

Dis concludes my weport ob dis weekend ats Grammy's houze in da big city in town.....and all was clear fur da west ob da nite den dis mornen (Sunday, tuday), me, sissy Pickie and Mom's wents back to our houze...Mom letted da Chickins outs, fed dem, took us fur a walk den we all came backs intu da houze where my Mom gabed us a Cookie ands we taked a nap waiten fur my Papa tu get home...