Da wing ob Zombies

I waz walken up da woad alongs da fence at our houze just minden my own buzinezz on #ZombieSquad pawtrol dis mornen. Da weafer waz clear wiffz no cloudz andz it waz goen tu be a nice sunny day. I sniffed awound by da front fence andz all waz clear so I pwoceded onwardz ands upwardz..up da woad I mean....

I wentz acwozz da woad tu pawtroll fur Zombiez...I sniffed awound andz awound butz all waz clear.  I waz surpwized cauze I hurd sompen weird andz culd smell sompen wank....buttz I carried on in my pawtroll fur da Zombiez....

Whenz I crozzed ober tu da ober sidez ob da woad I culdn'tz believez my eye ballz...were dey playen twickz on me? I looked and looked andz finally wealized whut I sawed....I waz vury alert andz on my toez...Whut I sawed waz free Zombiez haben a BBQ...don'tz knowed whut dey were BBQng butz it waz wank! Probably Zombie Gwass...andz Zombie Marshmollaos tu....I very quietly quept clozer and clozer...I foundeded a hole in da neighburz fence andz cwalled in..

Zombiez are so stupid andz don'tz here vury well so I hadz it made.....I waz quiet az a Church Moose andz gotz clozer and clozer...dey were standen wiffs dere backz tu da fire now in da pit eaten..dey were maken horrific noisez tu...slurpen and slobberen just chewen away...I very carefullyz gotz upz on my twu backs legz (I do diz alot)..andz very carefully andz quietly pulled outz my Zombie Dzcenturgaten gaget..(it'z like dey catchez wild Munkiez wiffz in Africia don'ts yu know)...I fhrew it upz iin da air andz it cobered all free Zombiez andz POOF dey were all free dzcenturgated intu dust! Dis is my Wing ob Zombies offical weport...fur da #ZombieSquad........YUR FWIEND ANDZ FELLOW HARD CHARGEN, FIGHTEN, SLAYER-SEARGENT IN DA ZOMBIE QUAD...FRISBEE BRADLEY...DA WuNdEr WeStIe....